G’day all, hope you are all well? I’m going to try to make this post more of a question, that’s the plan anyway. If you have been reading this blog and the comments you will be familiar with a guy called Alex, in one comment he said something along the lines of “I hate you blog sometimes because it makes me think” with that comment he basically hit the nail on the head. I often think too much and have said on many occasions “Thinking is Overrated”. The problem with thinking sometimes is it spirals out of control and drives you bonkers, but I started this blog because someone else got me thinking again, thinking in a different way. He thought very similar things to me which made me think “I am not as mad as a bucket of frogs, other people think like me, I am just unwell”. So I thought, I wonder if my thoughts could help others (and selfishly, me of course!), and from feedback I have had my thoughts and feelings do help others, so I am chuffed to bits!!! Maybe delusional thinking but…. Have I found my purpose??
Anyway, back to the question. I got an email yesterday from someone who has helped me in a major way during my “I’ve gone bonkers” period, part of that email went like this: –
“The manic thingy was quite normal for where you are at the moment. Feeling “ok†currently is a very fragile emotion currently. I won’t stop challenging you though, as you will be able to see how things are going. It will NEVER be a problem for me if it doesn’t work out. I know what great effort you are making.”
Oof!…… Has it got you thinking? Got me thinking straight away…..
“”OK” currently is a VERY FRAGILE EMOTION”
Oof!….. Here’s what i’m thinking, “OK” is perhaps the most tricky part of the recovery process, when you’re in the “pit of doom” you are in bed because you physically cant get out and if you do manage to drag yourself out of bed the whole day doesn’t really happen. When you’re feeling good it’s good but a bit of an alien feeling. When you’re feeling “OK” the up’s and down’s can happen many times a day and many times an hour, that’s tiring, that’s fucking hard work!
Now lets look at the last part: –
“It will NEVER be a problem for me if it doesn’t work out. I know what great effort you are making.”
That’s the sort of support I need, that’s the sort of support you should be trying to give to your loved ones because if they are still fighting, believe me they are making a great effort every day!! I am very lucky as I have so much support from family, friends (old and new), colleagues, Facebooker’s, Twitter’ers and of course you guys who take the time to comment on here. I am very lucky because my support team give me understanding and don’t judge me, maybe there are some in my support team that think Mental Illness is just in the mind and I should just pull myself together and have a good holiday, I can understand that as I have said before many times “I am a Neanderthal with depression, if I hadn’t experienced it I would be one of those idiots that says just pull yourself together”.
So a few questions to other peoples support teams: –
Are you giving that sort of support?
Are you helping rather than hindering?
Are you keeping your outdated, shite views to yourself?
Are you going to understand that your loved one isn’t making shit up?
If they had broken a leg would you think it was soft to have it plastered and they should just man up?
And one question to those who are fighting hard on a daily basis: –
Is “OK” ok or a fragile emotion that requires an awful lot of effort?
Keep Smiling 🙂
One more questions, does any of the above make any sense at all??
Hello Dude,
I’m going to read this post fully over the weekend, and the other recent posts of yours. Just wanted to be clear, my comment about “hating your blog” as it “makes me think” was sarcasm and a back-handed compliment. You prob know this anyway, sorry if I am stating the bleeding obvious here! Reason being, your blog is VERY interesting for me and STIMULATING, so when I read it, it really gets me thinking and I then end up typing lots of things, and thinking about lots of other things related to what you have blogged about. But this is excellent! If your blog didn’t have this impact on me, I wouldn’t be so interested in it. Apologies if I am stating the obvious with this post and you knew what I meant when I said “hate this blog sometimes”.
Ha-Ha and guess what! I’ve just realised that by me even typing this response I am perhaps THINKING TOO MUCH? I am perhaps thinking if other’s read your blog post above and think “Alex is knocking the blog” it will create anxiety for me. So, your blog posting has already had a desired effect in that it shows that over-thinking can be unhelpful! Damn I hate your blog sometimes LOL 😉
I hope some of what I’ve typed makes sense. Just to satisfy my paranoia and over thinking I LOVE JON’s BLOG!!!!
More on this breaking news story as we get it Jon. I will reply more over the weekend and try and actually answer the question you pose about “thinking” from a different angle. Expect a long post as usual, I think about 894 words might cover it.
Alex
🙂 yup, think you might be over thinking a little, but that makes me very proud!! Not sure 894 words will be enough dude. Keep reading, keep posting and of course…..
Keep Smiling 🙂
Peace out
1st time I have read any of your blogs Jon. I think they are some great questions for a support team. But i doubt the people who need to consider these will never even bother to look at something like this. I doubt they would seek to understand as they think it is just nonsense.
However I used to think depression was bulls hit and nonsense until it got me. I still keep messing up my own recovery because I start thinking like that every time I get to ok and think I need to get off these tablets and I am a nut job. I also believe that’s what people think of me so shy away from talking about it.
I think the blog is great. Wish I’d of read it sooner. I think it has helped just reading and commenting. Thanks Jon x
Hi Lisa, thank you. Yup you are probably right about them not reading something like this, but it’s all there now so bombard the fuckers with exboozehound links. I tried to get off the pills a long time ago after I got sober, didn’t take long before I was messed up again!! Nothing wrong with being a nut job, although probably not best to put on your CV. If people think like that about you and haven’t got the balls to tell you then who gives a shit about them, they are just numpties!! I hope it has helped “just reading and commenting” and if it has then it is my pleasure. Catch you soon, Keep Smiling 🙂